Pregnancy Loss

Coping with the grief from a pregnancy loss:

Communication

• Talk about your baby and your feelings with your partner, family, and friends. It may sound trite, but this is an excellent outlet for releasing bottled-up emotions
• Try to resume old relationships and start new ones, as a couple and as individuals
• Learn more about talking to children about a loss

Help from Others

• Admit to yourself and your family when you need help. This can lessen your pain and loneliness
• Accept help from others
• Let others know specific things they can do for you, such as providing food, company or childcare
• Allow family and friends to share your grief and let them offer their support
  • Attend a support group. Couples who have "been there" can give support, help and hope

Taking Care of Your Emotional and Spiritual Health

• Read books, articles and poems that provide understanding and comfort so you do not feel alone. Avoid “scare” literature and technical medical publications
• Keep a diary or journal of thoughts, memories and mementos
• Write letters, notes or poems to or about your baby
• Request help or support from your clergy to renew your faith and hope

Big Decisions and Changes

• Don’t move or change jobs or relationships. Wait 24 months before making these changes
• Avoid long trips
• Coping mechanisms and reflexes are impaired, making judgments difficult
• Don’t put away baby clothes until you are ready
• Don’t let others make decisions for you

Caring for Your Physical Health

• Avoid junk foods and fast foods
• Drink eight glasses of liquids (juice, water, soda) each day. It can be useful to keep a measured jug of water in the refrigerator to ensure that you drink enough
• Don’t drink caffeine or alcohol because they may cause dehydration, headaches, or lower back pain. Alcohol can also depress body function and natural emotional expression
• Do something active every day, such as biking, walking, jogging, aerobics, or stretching. Even a walk around the block can be useful
• Avoid tobacco because it depletes the body of vitamins, increases the acidity of the stomach, decreases circulation, and causes palpitations
• Avoid increased work activity. Maintain rest patterns if you are unable to sleep
• Schedule a physical examination about four months after experiencing a loss because the body is at risk of developing diseases during grief

Grief is a personal journey, but we are here for you if you need additional help and support.